We should have retired.
Week 1 filled our writing team with so much confidence, that week 2 broke our hearts worse than the two hours we all endured watching the result in Minneapolis. On average, our group fared no better than a random result generator. Yours truly only guessed two matches correctly.
We did have some positive results, however. Britt, Rob, and Cory all scored above .500, with six correct guesses each.
This week, the team went nearly all in on half the matches, with unanimous agreements in Dallas and Colorado (much to the chagrin of our native Minnesotan, Anne Marie, who had no choice but to pick the Rapids after the recent results from the Loons). The most contentious match, however, is possibly the most alluring this whole week. The Portland Timbers host Houston Saturday night, a battle of the two unlikely league leaders and the Dynamo’s first road match. Our predictions on this match are split nearly evenly three ways.
This week, we also feature our first guest of 2017, @SexualJumanji, a fledgling twitter persona with a respectable gaming background who has recently gotten more acquainted with the ins and outs of MLS. If you are unfamiliar with him, here are some of his MLS takes (warning, they could get hotter in the future):
me: i hate the seattle sounders— retired cs go pro (@sexualjumanji) March 12, 2017
*everyone online gets mad at me*
im sorry im sorry im trying to remove it
One thing to look for in todays MLS games: anything less than 3 goals for Dax Mccarty should be considered failure— retired cs go pro (@sexualjumanji) March 11, 2017
For all of our picks, see below: